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TopJokes4u.com : Joke152 - Man Vs. Woman - Part I
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Man Vs. Woman - Part I


Man: "Haven't we met before?" Woman: "Yes, I'm the receptionist at the V.D. Clinic."

Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."

Man: "Is this seat empty?" Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."

Man: "So, wanna go back to my place ? Woman: "Well, I don't know. Will two people fit under a rock?"

Man: "Your place or mine?" Woman: "Both. You go to yours and I'll go to mine."

Man: "I'd really like to get into your pants." Woman: "No thanks. There's already one asshole in there."

Man: "I'd like to call you. What's your number?" Woman: "It's in the phone book."

Man: "But I don't know your name." Woman: "That's in the phone book too."

Man: "So what do you do for a living?" Woman: "I'm a female impersonator."

Man: "Voulez-vous vous coucher avec moi ce soir?" (Would you like to go to bed with me tonight?) Woman: "Je voudrais bien, mais je n'ai rien a porter." (I would love to, but I have nothing to wear.)

Man: "What sign were you born under?" Woman: "No Parking."

Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?" Woman: "Do not Enter" (or) "Stop."

Man: "How do you like your eggs in the morning?" Woman: "Unfertilized !"

Man: "Hey, come on, we're both here at this bar for the same reason" Woman: "Yeah! Let's pick up some chicks!"

Man: "I'm here to fulfill your every sexual fantasy." Woman: "You mean you've got both a donkey and a Great Dane ?"

Man: "I know how to please a woman." Woman: "Then please leave me alone."

Man: "I want to give myself to you." Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."

Man: "I can tell that you want me." Woman: "Ohhhh. You're so right. I want you to leave."

Man: "If I could see you naked, I'd die happy: Woman: "Yeah, but if I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing."

Man: "Hey cutie, how 'bout you and I hitting the hot spots?" Woman: "Sorry, I don't date outside my species."

Man: "May I see you pretty soon?" Woman: "Why? Don't you think I'm pretty now?"

Man: "Your body is like a temple." Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."

Man: "I'd go through anything for you." Woman: "Good! Let's start with your bank account."

Man: "I would go to the end of the world for you. Woman: "Yes, but would you stay there?"

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