A woman goes to the doctor's office and says, "Doctor, I've got a strange problem and I need your opinion." "Can you describe your symptoms?" he asks.
"Well, it's easier if I show you," she said and, standing up, proceeded to undress. When she was down to her underwear, she sat on the edge of the examining table and spread her legs to reveal two small green circles on her inner thighs. "They don't hurt or anything, but I was a little worried about them."
The doctor peered closely at the two circles and asked, "Are you a lesbian by any chance?"
Embarrassed and slightly taken aback by this question, especially coming from a man with his head between her thighs, she replied, "Well yes I am, actually. Why do you ask?"
Well, I'm afraid you'll have to tell your girlfriend that her earrings aren't real gold."